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Similar to the Commentaries game except that the team give the commentary to a historical event in the persona of TV or radio commentators suggested by the Chairman.

This round involves the teams alternating the names of unconnected people, with the other team trying to spot a connection.

undelivered letters
There must be countless letters that have never arrived which had they been delivered could have changed the course of history. The panellists are asked to suggest their possible content.

unhelpful advice
This is based on a game played by people in the traffic news department which they call Stagger Your Journey. The teams are asked to give unhelpful advice on a topic given by the Chairman.

universally challenged
TBC - Editor.

unoriginal innovations
This game is inspired by the Innovations catalogue. Everyone gets mountains of junk mail delivered daily, offering page upon page of interest to the weak willed and gullible. This raised the idea as to how older inventions may have been sold by the magic of the mail order catalogue. The panellists are asked to tell some of their favourite old innovations.

unreported historical events
In this round the Chairman spins the wheel of history, and every time it alights on a date the teams provide a previously unreported historical event.

unsuccessful book titles
As we all know the world of publishing has undergone seismic technological changes from e-books that can be found on-line to Kindles that can be found on South African birthday cakes. Not all books are assured of success. so the teams are asked to suggest titles of books that would be guaranteed to flop.

unsuccessful products
Despite huge marketing campaigns and the best of intentions some products are doomed to fail. Take for example Sainsbury’s ill fated Condom for Life. The teams are asked to suggest some products that never caught on with the public.

updated proverbs
The English language is constantly updating and with good reason. Just rewind to the start of 2020 and examine the plight of the Mexican beer industry and its ill-fated I-heart-Corona t-shirts. It was a double blow for the industry, as they had just changed its other beer's name from Salmonella. The teams are asked for examples of proverbs that have been updated to suit more modern times.

Before this show we asked 100 people if they had ever watched the TV quiz show Pointless. So to those who said yes, namely 99 house bound pensioners and one Mr. A. Armstrong of London, this next round is dedicated to you.

Welcome to Useless. We put the same question to 100 people and made a note of their answers. The job of our contestants tonight is to come up with the most useless answers and score zero points. And here to keep an eye on the answers is my brand new Useless friend, it’s Richard.

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